- work a full time job (that i LOVE and couldn't give up if I tried)
- keep my house clean and presentable (how clean is questionable at times, but I do the best I can)
- schedule all family appointments (from Doctor to Dentist to car maintenance to Veterinary)
- schedule leisure time with family and friends
- find sitters when necessary
- plan transportation (which is ME) to and from daycare and the previously mentioned appointments
- do most of the cooking/lunch packing/snack making
- do all the household shopping (grocery and otherwise)
- pay the bills (yours, mine and ours)
- all household laundry
- Stockpiling crafts, recipes and household ideas on Pinterest (just to be prepared for anything)- Facebooking with my elite mommy group (DCHSMAP2001) to ensure that I am, in fact, a good mother/wife
- keep our 2 dogs healthy and happy
- spend quality time alone with my husband (as rare as it is, it does still happen)
- run around to make sure Eli and I are at most of my husband's sporting events
- And, most importantly, making sure Eli is a well loved, healthy and happy little boy with manners, discipline and a solid foundation.
Don't you think this list qualifies me as a Super Mom? Yes? No? What does? Who decides?
There are so many reasons that one may consider themselves to be "Super"... But when you look at the huge variety of parenting techniques and beliefs that are so prominently debated these days, how on God's green earth can I confirm my Super Mom status??? Of course I think I have earned it. But what about the Judge and Jury?
Some people would contend that I am not a Super Mom because I work. Because I have the audacity to let someone else "raise" my child.
There are also some people out there who condemn Stay at home mothers. Because they could be contributing to their families financial freedom and their child's social well being by going to work and leaving them with a daycare provider.
But what makes "some people" the the deciders? Who are they anyway? And why the hell do I care what "they" think?
I didn't make my baby food from scratch. So what? I let my child reasonably "cry it out". Your point is? I let my son drink juice and eat candy. <GASP> Honestly now? Yes, I let my son dress himself and don't care if he's matching or looking "perfect". Really, who cares? Does that make me less of a parent? I am so sick of watching mothers being judged by other mothers. By a group of women who should be able to stand by each other and help each other. I think that we are all doing the best we can and doing what we feel is right for OUR families... and I can say truthfully, that I stand behind the choices I have made as a mother, whether "some people" agree or not. So... did you bottle or breastfeed? I don't care, as long as your baby is well fed and at a healthy weight. Did you co sleep? As long as your co sleeping was done safely, I don't care! You didn't use cry it out and decided to stay up for 48 hours with your crabby baby in your arms instead of putting him down and letting him figure things out on his own? I don't care, as long as you all got some sleep eventually and you feel good about your decision. And, I don't think that our differing parenting opinions make either of us less of a mother. Can't we all just get along ladies??
Can we all just put aside our differences and come to an agreement on what it takes to be called a Super Mom... Because I think I learned it this morning...
At some point during our hurried morning schedule my 3.5 year old walks into the bathroom. I'm trying to get ready for work and he wants to tell me the life's story of a #2 pencil.... Mentally I'm thinking: Crap, we're going to be late again... But I say: sure honey! Wow! I didn't know that! He looks so proud to be telling me all this "information" about this amazing #2 pencil. He's smiling. He's relaxed. He's using his imagination. And he's proud of himself. I couldn't be happier! So I go about my routine, and he's sitting happily in the living room drawing with his pencil, that I just learned <wink><wink> was sharp and used for writing things and if it breaks you just make it sharp again. Who knew??!!??
Next thing I know, Eli runs back to me, latches his arms around my leg and shouts: "I love you mom!! You're MY Super Mommy!!" And runs right back out... leaving me practically in tears.
At that moment it became clear to me. To him, almost none of the things on MY Super Mom list matter. He honestly couldn't care less if I take care of the bills, or fold the towels, or that I schedule his doctor appointments. He has no idea that there are mothers attacking other mothers because they choose one way of parenting over another. To him, the only thing matters is that I am "present". That I am always willing to pay attention to him, to give him a hug, to read stories and to kiss the scrapes on his knees when he takes a tumble... My son is the sole evaluator of my parenting and he will be the one to make the definition of his Super Mom... in his innocence he can't see the chores of daily adult life. That isn't what matters to him. He just sees love. Love. Love. Love.
And THAT, my friends, is what defines a Super Mom.
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